theApproach Bootcamp: Boston
"Dan R."
I'd been actively sarging for about nine months before the workshop.
Mostly, I'd used routine-based indirect methods. These got me a
few number closes and a date once in a while, but nothing beyond
that. Mostly, I just ended up either entertaining girls or weirding
them out. Of course, I kept telling myself that this was normal,
that I needed to talk to 1000 groups of girls before I got good.
Fact is, my improvement was extremely slow, and I probably never
would have been able to attract a girl using routines and fake disinterest.
Before the workshop, Vincent and Sebastian introduced me to their
style of game (Natural Game). For a summary of their system, read
"The Transition to Natural Game parts 1 and 2" by Vincent.
Natural Game emphasizes spontaneity over structure, mutual value
escalation, and being congruent to your intention at all times.
They teach no canned material, but instead teach you to develop
your own personality. These concepts were explained to me briefly
before the workshop, and with just a rudimentary grasp of these
principles my game improved noticeably. Coming into the workshop,
I had a girlfriend, but had trouble attracting new girls to add
to my rotation. After the workshop my game improved dramatically,
and I became much more successful with women.
Day 1
The first day of the seminar took place in a quiet bar/restaurant
area of a hotel in Boston. There were two other students besides
myself. This was good, because it meant that we each got a lot of
personalized attention.
The seminar was very relaxed and informal, but packed with good
information. I was scribbling furiously the whole time, trying to
get everything down.
On the first day, Vincent and Sebastian covered a lot of material.
First was the basics of body language and tonality, the foundation
upon which the rest of your game rests upon.
Vincent basically has the sickest tonality ever. He refers to it
as a "blowjob voice" it is dominant, slow, deep and s*xual.
He said that tonality is extremely important; you cannot attract
a girl if you talk in a whiney voice or if you sound like you're
gay, but if your voice has the power to create attraction by itself,
it will make everything else you do much easier. He gave us a few
exercises to improve our tonality, and gave us all individualized
advice on what to focus on to improve our voices.
To me, he told me that I need to speak slower, and in a more dominant
tonality. I practiced with him a few times until I developed a tone
of voice which was acceptable to him. I was surprised by how much
better I sounded.
Body language was taught next. Sebastian pointed out a few quick
fixes to our body language. He gave a few points that we should
consciously focus on in our interactions to make us more attractive.
However, he said that mostly body language is controlled by your
mindset, and that micro-adjusting your body language when you don't
have the mindset to back it up will come off as incongruent. This
made sense to me, because I see guys all the time who try to lean
back and act cool, but at the same time have nervous gestures and
weak eye contact, which they can't consciously control and which
gives them away.
They also went into facial expressions, and gave us a few individual
fixes. They said that very subtle differences in facial expression
can make a huge difference in how attractive you are. For example,
I had fallen into the habit of unconsciously wrinkling my forehead
from time to time when I talked to people. Vincent and Sebastian
had an exercise targeted at eliminated unwanted facial expressions,
and although I found it difficult to get rid of, they were patient
and worked with me until I could maintain smooth, relaxed eye contact
with no forehead wrinkling.
They then went into the heart of their material. I don't want to
give it away, so I will just speak about it generally, but they
explained the three basic tenets of natural game (sponataneity over
structure, mutual value escalation, and congruence to intention).
Although I had some prior knowledge of these concepts, having them
thoroughly explained to me was invaluable. They also went into the
details of the system of internal beliefs which you want to develop.
Mutual Value Escalation I feel is the most important concept which
Vincent and Sebastian have contributed to this community. So many
guys mistakenly try to attract a girl by cutting down her value,
when this just makes them look insecure. They showed up how to attract
a girl by building her up, not cutting her down, which makes us
look secure and confident in ourselves.
They wrapped up the seminar by giving the students the basics of
technique they would need for the night's fieldwork: a few direct
and situational openers, an explanation of the direct intention,
and the basics of using screening to establish a dominant frame
and attract women.
Day 2
On the second day of the workshop, Vincent and Sebastian filled
in some of the technique behind the three tenets of Natural Game.
They went over wing dynamics, and how to subtly raise your wingman's
value, and isolate your individual girls so that you can eventually
escalate physically with them.
Another important topic covered on this day was vibing, or spontaneous
conversation skills. They explained how to develop into a spontaneous
conversational who never needs a script to attract a woman. To develop
this, they led us through their vibing exercise, where we were taught
to vibe on three levels. I feel that this was their best exercise
of the workshop, and it improved my vibing skills dramatically.
They also taught us how to spin a girls negativity or attempts
to put you in a submissive frame into topics which are better for
creating interesting conversations and attraction. They also made
us practice being assertive enough to decisively cut threads which
are bad for the conversation, and replace them with better threads.
The biggest technical concept of the day that we covered was screening.
Screening is one of the most important things which Vincent and
Sebastian teach. A screening frame is the most effective way to
interact with a woman, because screening creates both attraction
and rapport simultaneously.
They asked us what qualities we were looking for in a girl, and
based on those qualities, developed five or six solid screening
questions for each of us. They also taught us how to develop our
own subtle and effective screening questions, for when our tastes
in women grow more refined and we start looking more specific qualities.
This was a revelation to me, because I didn't screen girls at all
before this workshop. I can see now how unattractive that must have
been, the whole time I was trying to attract her, without ever considering
whether or not she was attractive enough for me. This was without
a doubt the most important thing I learned in the workshop. Screening
played a huge part when my wingman Lunotick, who also took the program,
and myself pulled those two virgins out of a club and f*cked them
at my house. It's good stuff ;).
Day 3:
On the final day, we received more instruction on openers, beyond
the basic ways to open which we were taught on the first day. We
were taught how to open with direct and indirect openers, and why
spontaneous openers are always better than canned openers, whether
they be direct or indirect.
Mostly though, we discussed issues which came up beyond the initial
pickup. We were taught phone game, and how to petheApproachst confidently
and get the girl to meet up for a date. This was important to me,
because I previously got a lot of numbers, but almost all of them
flaked out on me. Vincent has an extremely low flake rate, almost
0%. He explained to us why women flake on men, and how we can improve
ourselves so that we are not the type of men women flake on.
Sebastian explained to us the basics structure of a date/day2,
and how to lead them logistically and emotionally towards s*x. They
also went into some tips on how to overcome last minute resistance.
They taught us about the two kinds of last-minute resistance, and
two separate techniques to overcome each kind.
They gave us some tips on how to be better in bed and create a
more intensely pleasurably experience for the woman and for yourself.
Finally, they gave us advice on managing multiple relationships,
which is one of their specialties. This is something which they
offer which almost nobody in the community covers in-depth, but
was very important to me. I dislike one-night stands and my goal
is to have a rotation of girlfriends who I am in committed and polyamorous
relationships with. I think they were both currently dating somewhere
around five women each, and they told me how they eliminated jealousy
in their relationships, and maintained loving relationships with
women who were happy to give to them and contribute to their lives.
Field Work
Because I was not 21 at the time of the workshop, I couldn't accompany
the other students to the nighttime field work portion of the workshop.
This sucked, but fortunately Vincent and Sebastian both gave me
lots of in-field attention on other occasions, as well as on the
daytime portion of the workshop.
The area in which Vincent and Sebastian excel unquestionably over
all other PUAs in this community is daytime game. The main area
in which they took me for daytime field work was a heavily trafficked
shopping district in Boston, with lots of HBs ;).
When I first was introduced to their methods, I started off opening
with canned opinion openers ("Hey guys ... female opinion ... who
lies more?). They explained to me why especially in
the daytime, these types of openers were making me less attractive
and making me seem like I was afraid to express my true intentions.
They taught me how to open direct, and it has worked MUCH better
for me. Ever since then, I've cringed a little bit every time I
hear the words "I need a female opinion" because
these guys were just how I was, and don't realize what a turn-off
those openers are.
In addition to general direct openers, they also taught me situational
and specific compliment openers. I would estimate that I open 50%
of girls with specific compliments, 25% with general compliments,
and 25% with situational openers now. I open more sets, and have
a MUCH higher close ratio on the sets which I open.
One fun set which we did on together was in a store, where I saw
one of the clerks busting out dancing to the music playing. I'm
like "hey, this girl's got all the moves"; and she and
all the girls in her group laughed. I started talking, she's into
me, and I'm touching her and showing her dance moves. I go for the
close, and she asks me how old I am. I tell her, and she's like
ohh, I'm 35. Haha, she looked way younger, she was hardcore milf.
When I eject, and go meet up with Sebastian.
He asks me how it went. I tell her I didn't close her because she
was 32. He's like, so what? Go back there and close her! So we go
back to reopen her again. Vincent tells me the plan - they'll occupy
all her co-workers while I get her to show me the men's products
in the back of the store to isolate her. Then, I'll #close her.
They execute the plan flawlessly - there are three separate conversations
going on, with Vincent's and Sebastian's girls being completely
drawn in by them and not paying attention to us at all. I ask her
what kind of men's stuff they sell here, so she brings me over to
the back to show me. Then she gets all technical and stuff on me,
telling me about the dermatological benefits of face cream. I bust
on her for knowing so much about face cream to get the convo off
that stuff, and we're flirting again for a minute or so. I go for
#close again, and she laughs and says she's married, she can't give
out her number to someone ten years younger than her, etc. I playfully
petheApproachst, and she's all showing me her ring and pictures
of her kid and stuff. After a while I stop petheApproachsting, and
I head back to join Sebastian and Vincent.
Now even though I didn't get a close out of this one, I really
enjoyed this approach. It taught me that if you are high value like
we were in that set, you can petheApproachst, and reopen as much
as you want without losing attraction. This all goes back to Vincent's
attraction vs. value model of social dynamics. If you are high value,
you don't need to pretend like you don't like her in order to create
surface attraction.
In every set, one of the instructors gave me specific targeted
feedback on how I could improve. More importantly, they boosted
my state tremendously, so I found that I was getting better and
better every set. I could have pulled a number of insta-dates during
the field-work, but I opted to take numbers instead so they could
keep teaching me.
The most mind-blowing thing which they showed me was one minute
number closing. With all my bad programming, I found it unbelievable
that they could create solid attraction, and get phone numbers which
don't flake in under a minute. When they demonstrated right in front
of me, and assisted me in DOING IT MYSELF, my limiting beliefs about
needing a certain amount of time to attract a girl were thoroughly
killed.
All in all, the field work with the instructors improves your game
much faster than field work on your own would. Instead of petheApproachsting
in your mistakes, they are instantly corrected, while you build
more confidence from your success.
Conclusion
There are some solid workshop programs out there, and some which
are genuinely awful. Do your research thoroughly before you take
one, and read all the reviews out there.
I have not met any of the other PUAs who run workshops, but in
my opinion this workshop is the best deal on the market. I have
not met any former students of other workshops who can compare to
the results Vincent and Sebastian's students have post-workshop.
Within two months of the workshop, I totally eliminated my approach
anxiety, am able to attraction consistently, and can easily get
solid phone numbers and insta-dates. I don't need to spend ten hour
a week sarging anymore, I can get enough numbers for the week in
my spare time between classes. In addition to the girl from the
club who I f*cked, I've added two new girls to my rotation of girlfriends,
and both are awesome girls who are devoted and loyal to me, and
vastly improve my life. I've also made out with a bunch of other
girls, and vastly improved my social life.
A friend of mine who lives in NYC who also took the program saw
similar improvement. From being unable to approach and not knowing
what to do to attract a woman, he was able to f*ck three women in
the two months after his program.
The results speak for themselves. There are so many people who
take a workshop, and see no improvement, or just get worse. Don't
be one of those people. This workshop is documented to have a dramatic
impact on your social and s*x lives within weeks, not years or thousands
of interactions down the line. I would wholeheartedly recommend
this program to anyone who wants to make a serious change in their
lives for the better.
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